Friday, July 24, 2009

New project!!! Some sad thoughts.





Making some bracelets, fun to do and decorate with vintage buttons and charms. They are crocheted . Just a little project in between other larger creations. Looks like a beautiful day coming up, Am redoing my picture wall and have asked all the people
on the wall to update. grandchildren, great grandchildren and other family members.Hope they can do this for me so it does not hold up my plan. I don't mind e-mail pictures then I can make them any size I want. So much for that. I finished the Ist detective ladies book(the new one) and It was as always a great read. I wish I would have kept them all for a reread. May buy them again.Can't wait for the new season of the HBO series. Project runway will be starting soon. Don't you love it. So sad about Jon and Kate- what a worm he is. I guess he thinks he is a star.Wants to act like one anyway.
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Can I share with you today?? If not then don't read any further.
I am feeling sad today as there is a lot of animosity in the family and I often wonder why they can't all get along with each other. There is always something in the wind. Someone on the outside-the scapegosat (so to speak) and then the bandwagon theory takes over and The whole thing escalates into an ending of relationships and not speaking for years. I don't think these relationships will ever be repaired. I am guilty too, It is a way of life to walk away. The easy way out , I have a saying that I used for years as a signature in my e-mail- and I quote" Water and Words, easy to pour, impossible to recover" Sometimes a person has to step off to protect themselves. Words are so powerful, and our way of life makes it possible to say terrible things to one another via e-mail. It is much easier to send terrible messages in an e-mail that face to face or even on a telephone.If feelings could be shared without hate or malice It would be wonderful but I don't see it as happening with our family.The lies, the lies are unending. Everyone has a chip and the old saying is if you are looking for someone to knock it off you will find them. That's all for today.

11 comments:

Joyce said...

A thought from an AB list lurker...

You cannot control anyone else's behavior and, sadly, some families have a culture of wounding each other. What you CAN do, however, is to live by example. Instead of shutting doors when someone says something hurtful, use words that leave the passageway open: "Your words hurt me but I love you more than that hurt. Let's put family first and talk about how to make this (whatever the issue is) better."

If the persons who are doing the damage are operating from a self-proclaimed moral high ground, gently remind them that relationships are more important than keeping score.

I will you well -
Joyce

Tania Pelletier said...

So sorry to hear about your family turmoil Betty... it's sad and nerve wracking when people can't get along, especially family. My family is experiencing some of that too... I'll be blogging about it soon, but can't just yet.

I'm thinking of you,

Tania

Anonymous said...

Hi Bloubell--

Your words are AWESOME, and so so true! I have copied and pasted your "wiseness" to print out for myself to remind me of these thoughts.

I, myself, am guilty of using the easy way out...sending an email or leaving a voice message. It's easier...but I am learning...I paid the price when others reacted in an unexpected way to my comments.

Harsh words can never be
unspoken...they may be forgiven but never forgotten.

Thinking of you and wishing you well...
Kathy [haynes117@aol.com]

bloubell said...

Thankyou for your input on this family crisis. It really helps to get other perspectives on family issues. Have a great day.

Linda said...

Hi! You are so right about the email being much easier to say negative things about/to people. Unfortunately, my new daughter-in-law is that way. If you agree with everything she says or does then watch out - and i have been the target of many hateful words. It's funny though because I never got angry at her, I say that is because of the Lord working in my life, because normally I would get angry about things like that. I tried taking the high road, I wrote a letter, which I read to her over the phone (on several voice mail messages - she wouldn't answer if she knew it was me). Anyway, things are better right now but I do feel I have to be very careful with what I say to her. Not the kind of relationship I had dreamed of having with her, but ....
Sorry to ramble on...
Thinking of you and your family.
Linda

bloubell said...

I understand ,Linda It is a shame that you have to be careful of what you say, It is like they have the upper hand in a relationship because you want to be friends and share in your son's life and they use that fact against you. Especially if there are grandchildren. I am always thankful when everything is going smoothly. No matter how short lived. Take care. Betty

Laura Haviland said...

Love your blog, your art is great.
Hugs, Laura.
I really love your Art Paper Dolls.

Debbie L said...

Betty,
I don't have any "sage" advice for you, but I know the pain and frustration you feel. I don't think all families/relationships are wonderful, there always skeletons in everyones past/closet. I keep hopeful and when I feel really down, I turn on the news and see my problems aren't all so bad,it could be worse. Hang in there

area rug cleaning Los Angeles said...

I totally know how you feel. We have a very similar situation with my family. I just don’t want to talk about that. Just pray to God and it will all be okay.

Halo fabrics said...

Family relationship problem, that is so heart breaking, believe me I’ve been in a very dysfunctional family you can never imagine. I hope you’re okay! This will all pass, rest assure you will recover from all this.

bloubell said...

It is nice to know I am not alone with these fammily problems, thanks for the uplifting words and thoughts. Sometimes I don't think you ever really know anyone in this life.